Monday, June 13, 2011

The basic instinct

A happy- go- lucky, young, restless, girl.... who had her own free will, doing things ,going places....... living life.
You never bothered to think twice before plunging into something that your heart desired , you never cared about proving yourself correct , or what the planet thought about you . It never moved you if someone looked down upon you, if someone hated you , or even if someone was falling in love with  you...it was always,"who cares" or "their bad".......
 But suddenly one morning , you are sitting beside a hospital bed , when a cannula laden tiny hand moves out of a blanket, touches your face , waking you up.
 The creator of that wonderful touch tells you to pick him up in your lap, and once you do that, he clutches your neck, starting to cry of pain... his cries grow louder, as his clutch becomes tighter... you could have called for a nurse, or even the doctor, this was never your responsibility, you weren't the one supposed to sort this out.....
 But something in that clutch appeals to you, those tiny hands clinging on to you, that little head resting on your bosom......you are struck with the awesomeness of those touches, you go through an unexplainable turmoil of emotions.
This was just very unexpected, you have been staying awake for eleven nights in a row now  and instead of feeling exhausted, or giving up, you just feel more determined than ever that you have to put everything right, you just know that you have to ease it for him, he was depending on you, expecting that you would somehow take him out of all his pains....you suddenly start caring about proving yourself, caring about what this 7 year old thought of you, you were moved because he was looking up to you, and may be, just may be, he loved you!!!
..... you return the force of his clutch with a gentle touch, somehow, magically you just happen to know exactly what you are supposed to do, you are almost perfect at it, there's no stress, you are loving it!!
 Slowly, he stops crying,his breathing eases,he nudges at your neck, his eyelids droop and he falls asleep,

You are left speechless....
Looking at that diseased, scarred , 2 . 5 feet tall, 10 kilo heavy bundle of problems and difficulties, you feel you have never seen so much beauty in your entire life,
After having so many sleepless nights and restless days, you feel you have never felt so much at peace...

You feel the tickle of his breath on your neck, you notice that his breathing has somehow matched the rhythm of your pulse....you trace his cheek with your finger, he smiles in his sleep... you realize your potential to induce that smile , you are spellbound !!

  you have never felt so competent
 so complete... so needed... so beautiful

He just makes me speechless :)



8 comments:

  1. wow, that was something... Really vivid description of a mother's emotions for her newborn...

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  2. Ur heart is a gud blogger coz nbdy else cn write a blog post expressing such level of sincerity n dedication.it is Gud enuf to read it again n again. Shows how beautiful luv cn bcum if u just do it.shows how many oder beautiful gifts luv brings to u if u just accept just one gift called luv.i hav started luving to love more n more.. or anbdy who reads n feels it will do so…it was next to impossible to chose which ws d best sentence,but still I managed to chose dis one- ‘’After having so many sleepless nights and restless days, you feel you have never felt so much at peace...’’-dis shows how luv can manage to be beautiful as always ,even in odd situations...Yes,dis must be directly frm ur heart....Ashish

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  3. @the enigma: it wasnt really that, bt yeah, something along those lines....thank u so much

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  4. @ashish: wow ashish.... this was the best compliment I have ever received!! u just made me very happy!!! :D

    this too was straight frm da heart :)
    "god bless" ;)

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  5. aww...m touched..:))
    loved it!

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  6. Are you his real mother? But you r too young to be nebody's mother! And such feelings at this age, wowowow!!!

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  7. @anonymous: thanku, if tht was a complimnt!
    wish u had a name tho!!

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